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Charts & Graphs: UK top 40

Jun 25, 2013
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Each week Bro Jackson takes a look at a select group of music charts from across the ranking landscape to see what’s hot, and whether or not said hotness is warranted.

The Chart: UK Top 40

The Compiler: BBC Radio One

1. “Blurred Lines,” Robin Thicke (ft. T.I., Pharrell)

Two separate charts, one American, the other British, but both featuring “Blurred Lines” at number one. Robin Thicke is bringing the world together, folks.

Good for: Last week I said it was good for practicing your falsetto. This week, let’s work on your dance moves.

2. “The Other Side,” Jason Derulo

The song is standard electro-pop, but mostly I’m pissed that we aren’t treated to Derulo singing his name at the beginning of the song like usual. On the other side (see what I did there?), we do get lyrical gems like, “We got closer, ’til you were eating off my spoon.” Dude broke his vertebrae during tour rehearsals in January 2012 and was nearly paralyzed, so it’s great to see the 23-year-old on his game.

Good for: Singing “Jason Derulooooooooo” when the song starts, since he won’t do it.

3. “La La La,” Naughty Boy (ft. Sam Smith)

This isn’t an inherently bad song by any stretch, but it’s amazingly boring. Like, nothing happens.

Good for: Freestyle sleeping.

4. “Let Her Go,” Passenger

This song is amazing. I discovered Passenger late last year and can’t stop listening. British singer-songwriter deliciousness that is, in my opinion, way better than Ed Sheeran. And Ed’s pretty baller.

Good for: Rediscovering the beauty of life.

5. “Goin’ Crazy,” Dizzee Rascal (ft. Robbie Williams)

British hip-hop is so much cooler because of the accent. I wonder if they think the same thing about us. I have a feeling they don’t. Remember when grime was a thing and the college radio hipsters would champion this dude like he was the next big thing? But then all of Rascal’s hype was concentrated on Lady Sovereign in 2006 and she wasn’t fit for combat–good to see Rascal paying rent in Europe.

Good for: Checking the dictionary to make sure there isn’t an r at the end of the word saw.

6. “Get Lucky,” Daft Punk (ft. Pharrell)

Nope. Don’t care what anybody says, this song isn’t good.

Good for: Arguing with me because you probably like it.

7. “Dear Darlin’,” Olly Murs

Plaintive, emotional vocals lamenting a lost love over a sorrowful piano. Sound familiar? Of course it does, it’s every pop ballad ever written.

Good for: Crying. If you’re into that sort of thing.

8. “Wild,” Jessie J (ft. Dizzee Rascal and Big Sean)

This is a pretty gnarly beat. The only thing that would make it better is if Jessie J wasn’t wailing over it. I guess that kind of defeats the purpose of the song though, doesn’t it?

Good for: Searching YouTube for “Jessie J Wild Instrumental.”

9. “Everything Has Changed,” Taylor Swift (ft. Ed Sheeran)

Well, at least the Brits are smart enough to like the T-Swift songs that are good. And of course they rep their own, hence the presence of Sheeran.

Good for: Jingling all the way.

10. “Another Love,” Tom Odell

See #7.

Robert Rich is a digital marketer living in Dallas, TX. He knows more than you'll ever want to about NASCAR, professional wrestling, and all those modern rock bands you listened to during your angsty high school years. Follow him on Twitter: @RobertRich.